IC; Deerington Inbox

[suchmiracles]

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[suchmiracles]

fern, you did do the right thing in being honest with him
and with yourself

but doing the right thing doesn't always mean things turn out exactly the way we want. that doesn't mean you shouldn't do the right thing
sometimes it means putting someone else first, even if you don't get what you want, because you love them and want them to be happy

but your feelings aren't wrong, at all
love is never a bad or wrong thing to feel. the opposite in fact. it's the best and brightest force in the universe.

[laminae]

he said that too, but it doesn't feel like i did the right thing
all i'm doing is hurting him
and if he wants to be with her then all i've done is hurt him AND myself

how is any of that good?

[suchmiracles]

it's good because it's being true to yourself. trying to suppress and hide these sorts of feelings will just hurt more and might end up damaging your friendship even more.

as long as Varian is honest with you too, then you can work through this together

[ Though Kurt's privately starting to wish you had picked someone better, Fern. ]

[laminae]

[Sorry Kurt, apparently there is something magnetizing about a fellow disaster.]

my mental vault's always worked out before

yeah right
he's going to stick with Ruby and prove i can't do anything right
i might as well just start repressing everything right now

[suchmiracles]

[ There's a decent pause before Kurt answers. He feels responsible for Fern, but he knows from long experience that it's important to let teenagers make their own choices -- and their own mistakes. ]

I'm not going to stop you from doing what you think you need to do, Fern
but I'm here for you if you want to talk about it at all, no matter where or when

[laminae]

[Unfortunately, it's a consideration Fern is taking seriously. Not having feelings at all is easier than trying to struggle through them.]

even in the middle of the night?

[suchmiracles]

absolutely. I don't really sleep for very long these days anyway.

[laminae]

that doesn't sound healthy
but thanks